February 20, 2013
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Forgiveness
I’ve blocked memories that used to hurt me, must say, i’ve become so good at it, that i don’t recall much of my past.
I like to think i’m pretty much a forgiving person but there are various degree of forgiveness. Forgiving is one thing and forgetting is another.
I’ve forgiven the ex who hurt me, the thing bout relationships, it takes two hands to clap, kinda similar to wearing a wrong size of shoe, it would just not be comfortable no matter how hard you try and try to fit in…
Tho, i’ve forgiven the person, i can’t/ won’t forgive the act done, where he hit, kicked me and spat on me when i finally muster up courage to break it off… It was just that one time, a nightmare, but enough for me to stay away from any potential relationships.. Its not some thing, one could brag bout or tell anyone bout it when it happened, however i did told a few people weeks later that he hit me but none would believe me cos he’s a manipulative double face douche..
Jesus said not to throw your pearls to pigs- be careful that you do not give something precious to someone who at best cannot recognise its beauty or at worst will trample on it.. andi find that theres alot of truth and wisdom in it.
I took my time to heal the only way i know, but its a scar that only god can heal, im just glad it doesn’t sting as much as it used to.
It’s exhausting to be bitter bout things that has happened, there’s so much beauty around us, why let all that pain come in to steal all that beauty away.
Comments (9)
Yeah, Matthew 7:6 was an important verse for me. I’ve gotten better at identifying pigs in my life.
It is exhausting to hold on to resentments. I get it every onnce in a while when I remember something that I resent. It still may have a sting. For instance, I don’t go fishing anymore. I used to fish at local area streams. Then many years ago, I disliked the foul mouths and littering and the many people that I’d see at so many of the streams. So fo a time, I went only at times when few others would be fishing. I had a schedule that worked. That changed and I just dropped fishing for the last almost 20 years. It seems I had buried my intense dislike of some fishermen though. A week ago, a friend asked if I ever went fishing. The resentment boiled up in me as I related my reason for having stopped going fishing. I’d been unawre that it was still in me. Later, I made a list of feelings I had and what I thought are the underlying reasons. I gave it to God. I feel much better about that I choose not to fish while large numbers of fishermen may be about. I realize that I’d still enjoy it if I want to do so. I can even do so when ever I please or with a friend if I would choose to do so. I think that I released the resentment and the bitterness that had been hiding in me in a general way. Of course, I will still dislike it that people that shout, curse and litter at streams. However, I don’t have to let that fester in me and in some way connect itself to the act of fishing any more.
Wishing you the best.
I have forgiven my mom and gals in grade school, but I sure remember the events. I am 79. It is better–but the memories will not die.
You seem a lot more forgiving than most. I’m nowhere near that point, but it is the act done and the lifetime of living with the fallout from it that i cannot forgive.
Part of the forgiving is reliquishing the scars, it is only through Christ it is accomplished. To forgive is to set a prisoner free only to discover that prisoner was your self. There are times when things done to me in my past that seems to cause a reaction to something in the presnt, allowing me to know it sint complelty gone. One of the ways that I have found easier to remove those scars is to realize I wasnt only a victim, I also caused scars on others. It is much easier to forgive and forget what others have done when we discover we have wounded others. Not always in the same manner, but there are instances in which mental scars are far worse than physical scars.
GBU
That was a horrible nightmare indeed. I am so sorry you had to go through that, Melly.
It’s unfortunate for you to have gone through that horrible phase.
Forgiving is indeed one thing and forgetting another. I find it easier to forgive others or myself; forgetting a wrong done to or worse still how I have wronged others is bloody tough.
Like you said though, it’s exhausting to be bitter about the past. Life’s too beautiful to keep thinking of the bad times.
Thanks everyone for the comments and encouragements, and sharing my story that’s so close to my heart. The whole post was to reflect on forgiving and letting go of past hurts.
Blessings.
Forgiveness is not easy for many people out there, esp. those who has no faith and no God in their lives.
Forgiveness requires great courage and deep beliefs that you can let go, release away those past, people, incidents … even yourself.
Until today, I am still learning to forgive people and I admit it is never that easy, esp when I am dealing with my temper. I can be quite a monster sometimes and my husband who is a very loving man never cease to support me, to love me, to encouraging me and my children … ah, my children, these creatures are the precious gifts the LORD give to any parents on this Earth – they are the ONES that helps me to go the right way, be forgiving of them, to know endless pure happiness and the one that shows me true healing of our broken-self.
Even their smiles are healing.
Yes, forgiveness is very powerful. Powerful, indeed.